It can be a very discouraging thing to have a disagreement with someone that you love, especially when it is your spouse. When you are in the midst of these arguments, so often doubt enters your mind and you wonder if you can pull through these strains. In all honesty, arguing can certainly be a sign of a healthy relationship.
What Arguing Can Mean
We are all different in many ways, and when you throw in the gender differences, it is a wonder anyone can stay together. In a healthy relationship, there will be times when you don’t agree with the other person, and issues need to be addressed.
If you and your spouse never argue or have moments of tension, that should make you feel concerned. The lack of disagreements can be the sign that you and your loved one are not relating to each other or communicating well.
It can certainly be a sign that you are not as close as you need to be. When you love someone, you will have times when you do not like what they are doing, and you’ll need to let them know that.
Don’t Stuff Your Feelings
Generally speaking, if you are never disagreeing with your spouse over anything, then one of you is stuffing your feelings down. It’s most important to be honest with the other person and say things that you are feeling. This is very hard for some people, and they may spend years stuffing down their response to their spouse’s actions.
The biggest problem with this type of approach is that one day, they are going to explode. When that happens, the other spouse will be completely caught off guard. Imagine getting 10 years down the road with someone, only to find you’ve been hurting them without knowing it for years? This is a recipe of divorce.
How to Settle a Disagreement With Your Spouse
Many disagreements are going to happen in a healthy relationship as well as unhealthy relationships. It is important to handle the disagreements in the best way to keep the marriage happy and healthy, not destroy it. In all situations between two parties, an agreement has to be reached through compromise.
If one side is not compromising, but demands that the other party meet all of their requests, there is no relating going on. When you love someone, you are saying: “I will put your needs and desires above my own”. In an argument, this is the same way.
The only way for a disagreement to be settled in a good way, is that you meet the one you love halfway. It is important that both individuals are able to make requests of the other person, but also to compromise.
Loving Each Other Is Most Important
In the midst of arguing or a lot of tension, a healthy relationship will continue to thrive on love. Even if you are upset with your significant other, that doesn’t mean that you will not have any moments of happiness or joy with them.
Often times, disagreements can last for long periods of time. During those periods, showing love to your spouse is very important. The way you respond to that person during times of tension will give you a great indication of the health of your relationship.
Give Your Spouse Unconditional Love
It is in these times that you will need to show unconditional love for the other person. You love them and show them your love even though you do not like the way they are handling a situation.
No matter what kind of relationship you are in, whether it be family, friend, or romantic interest, there will be times when you will experience some friction. It is good to keep that in mind next time you have an argument with the one you love.
Eventually, you will be able to resolve the problem with that person and ease the tension. Until that time, don’t forget to love each other.
Keelie is a mother of three amazing boys and married to her high school sweetheart, Austin. She spends her days running R5 Website Management, taking care of the home, and investing in her children. In her spare time, she loves to encourage married couples to grow deeper in their relationship and find joy in their marriage.