Have you ever been in the middle of intimacy with your spouse and had something happen that really distracted you? That’s me…all the time. I’ve worked really hard at eliminating distractions in the bedroom, but you can’t keep all things from happening.
Here’s a few things that can be distracting-
Animals Get In The Mix
I finally just banished our dogs from the bedroom. There was no telling when they were going to walk over to the bed in the middle of things to check stuff out. Or, one of them would let go of a big one right near our heads.
If you have pets, I suggest you promptly kick them out. In fact, this could be the first hints to your spouse that you want to get it on.
Phones Ring or Notifications Go Off
Having your phone ring or random notifications go off during love making can certainly take your head out of the game. It’s best to put your phones on silent while you are together. If you have an old school phone, then take it off the hook for just a few.
Kids Knock On The Door
There may be no getting around this one, because I don’t recommend you put your kids out on the street. I do suggest that if you are going to be together while they are awake, you let your children know you aren’t available for a few. We’ve bred it in our kids since they were little, that if the door is closed, we need privacy.
Do what you can to handle the issues quickly. However, if this is an ongoing problem when you are having sex, then you need to figure out how to reduce interruptions. We’ve used television and video games for a long time to keep our kids entertained while we sneak away.
Your Mind Wanders Off
Jay Dee, over at Uncovering Intimacy, wrote about this today. He talked about the kinds of things that wind up distracting your mind while you are being intimate. If you are having a hard time being present during sex, then he’s got some great tips for you.
Too Much Talking or Noise
Making noises and talking during sex can be exciting. In fact, we put together a bedroom language worksheet that helps you come up with words to say that turn each other on. But, too much talking, or talking at the wrong times can kill the moment.
If you are having a hard time concentrating, because your spouse is being too vocal, then you need to have a conversation. Probably not in the moment if you have never shared this with them before. But, after you have had the conversation ahead of time, it’s ok to talk tell them in the moment what you need.
Something Embarrassing Happens
I laughed at the post J at Hot Holy Humorous wrote about embarrassing things that happen during sex. The comments were pure gold. Plenty of couples talked about bodily noises going down during the act. Others shared about struggling to get clothes off, or miscalculating when trying to move positions.
If something embarrassing happens, do the best you can to laugh about it and move on. It’s ok to have fun during sex.
Your Fitbit Congratulates You
If you have a Fitbit, then you know it throws you a big party when you reach your step goal. It buzzes for a straight 10 seconds. For whatever reason, it counts the movements you are making during sex as steps. So, you have a pretty good chance of it going off during the last moments of your day.
Light Shines You In The Face
Overhead lights are the worst when you are laying on the bed and looking up. If you are having sex with the lights on (and I hope you are), cut off the overhead and use a lamp. Lamps cast a much softer glow and keep you from rolling over and being beamed in the face.
You or Your Spouse Starts Sweating
Some stickiness and sweating is bound to happen during sex. But, too much can be a major turn off for some people. Figure out what you can do to make sure you are both comfortable with temperature. You might need to cut on a few fans, or cut down the air.
These are some of the distractions that come to my mind. I’m sure you have your own to add to the list. My encouragement to you is to address any distractions that happen a lot.