How to Feel Beautiful Series Part 1

For quite a few months now, I’ve had something on my mind and I’m seeing this being addressed everywhere. Women, these posts are specifically for you. I am starting a series on how to feel beautiful.

I hope you check out my welcome video where I talk about some of the reasons I believe we don’t feel pretty or attractive enough.

How to Feel Pretty, Not How to Look Pretty

Before I go further, I want you to understand I am not writing a series on how to look beautiful, rather how to feel beautiful. I imagine in my mind that all of my readers are beautiful (because you truly are). I don’t think you need any help looking prettier.

Don’t think I’m telling you that you shouldn’t do things to look prettier. I am not against a woman doing what they feel is necessary to look nice. It is very important that you take care of yourself.

I’m known to highlight and or dye my own hair on occasion. This is a picture I took the other day after I highlighted my hair. I’m not anti-cosmetics and beauty regimens. This series is just not about how to make yourself look prettier and I want you to understand that before we move forward. 

What we all need is to stop looking at ourselves so critically and see the beauty that we possess. Each post that I write, I’ll give you a new challenge of what you need to do to feel more beautiful. 

Challenge #1

If you watched my intro video in this post, you will know what my first challenge is. I talked about how we like to compare ourselves to those around us. 

As women, we can sometimes have this idea that if we identify another person as pretty, then that means we aren’t pretty. I don’t know why we do this, but I’m telling you we do.

The quickest way to hate the way you look is to thumb through a beauty magazine, walk around the mall, browse through everyone’s selfies on Facebook and so on. If you feel insecure about the way you look, surrounding yourself with unrealistic pictures is a great way to feel bad about yourself.

I am challenging you to limit what you are looking at and what you are putting your attention on. For me, I stopped reading beauty magazines when I was a teenager, because they made me feel insecure. For you, it might be something else.

At least during my series, stop looking at unrealistic images and putting yourself in places that will make you feel less attractive.

Why It is Important For Your Marriage That You Feel Pretty

how to feel beautiful

There is a reason I’m focusing on feeling beautiful on a marriage and sex blog. The way you feel about yourself directly impacts every relationship you have in your life. If you have a poor self image, this will create problems in your relationships.

In particular, your marriage will suffer if you do not feel that you are beautiful. For one thing, you won’t be as satisfied sexually. It is very hard to feel sexually satisfied if you think you are unattractive or not pretty. If you don’t believe you are beautiful, you probably won’t believe your husband thinks you’re beautiful either.

Not feeling pretty will negatively impact your physical intimacy. When you feel sexy, you will act sexy, and feel freer to express yourself in your love life.

Also, when you don’t feel pretty, you won’t be able to accept the compliments from your spouse. That can be very damaging to your relationship, because you are telling them you don’t trust them or that they are lying. It is very hurtful for someone to give a compliment that is downplayed by another.

Low self-esteem contributes to other relational problems. You won’t feel comfortable asking to have your needs met. You will feel you are undeserving of good things in your life, which will cause you to make unhealthy decisions.

These are a few of the reasons that it is really important you stop believing the lies you’ve told yourself that you are not beautiful. 

Bloggers From Around the Web Focus on Feeling Beautiful

I’m not the only one that is writing about this subject. Check out some of these other amazing bloggers that are giving you ways to feel sexier and more beautiful this year.

J over at Hot, Holy & Humorous is challenging women to feel beautiful in 2015.

Gaye over at Calm Healthy Sexy is giving you simple ways to feel sexy this spring with a free printable download.

Shelia over at To Love, Honor and Vacuum tells you why frumpy makes you feel grumpy.

I hope that you continue to follow me as I lay out the different challenges I have in store to help you see yourself for what you really are…a beautiful and sexy woman. 

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10 Responses

  1. Hi Keelie – This is a great post and such a difficult challenge for most women. Thanks so much for sharing my post as part of it.

  2. This is a tough one for sure. So much of the problem is what women internalize about about themselves, not what their husbands say. One can certainly argue that the behavior of husbands can affect how their wives feel, but in the end, it really comes down to how women decide to feel about themselves. I tried to address this once with “Look Away. I’m Hideous,” but I could not really offer any solutions, only point out how women are buying into false perceptions about how their husbands see them. I hope you can offer some insights I missed or correct my possible misunderstanding of the problem.

    1. Yes, you are right in saying that a woman must decide they feel beautiful. No one can really do that for them. Yes, a husband that tells his wife she is beautiful is a great thing. However, it almost doesn’t make a difference unless the woman is willing to accept the compliment. That is for all of us though. If you aren’t good at accepting compliments, it won’t matter what anyone says to you, you won’t believe it.

      I have a pretty well rounded series to help women with this issue. I think it is very important for the health of a relationship that both the husband and wife feel secure in who they are.

  3. As a mom, it can be harder for me to feel beautiful when I’m so busy taking care of everyone else and don’t have as much time as I did before kids to take care of myself. However, when you’re focused on meeting the needs of others, you have less time for comparisons. So I guess it’s a balance. Funny enough, my post today was about being confident and comfortable in who God created us to be and the difference between how children see themselves and how adults see themselves. Hurray for embracing our beautiful uniqueness!

    1. Yay! Hooray for embracing our own beautiful uniqueness.:) I agree. It can be hard to set aside time to take care of yourself with young kids around. It is a battle I have fought for a long time, but one worth fighting.

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