How to Get Over The Gross Factor of Oral Sex

Some people really struggle with oral sex, because they think some or all of it is a little bit gross. I can totally empathize with that. It takes a lot to get comfortable with someone putting their face in your private areas.

If you or your spouse feel grossed out about giving and/or receiving oral sex, here are some things you can do.

Wash All Over Down There

Take the time to wash up with water and soap if need be. You can take time in the shower together or use a wet cloth to clean yourself. Once you are both clean, it can help you to relax. Also, I highly recommend using Lume and giving it some time to dissipate before giving each other oral sex. Sometimes, simply cleaning with soap isn’t enough.

Here is my full review on Lume.

This is the Lume product I’ve been using lately.

Use a Fragrance

In addition to cleaning yourself, and using Lume, consider using a fragrance to feel fresher. Lume is great for getting rid of butt smells and pubic area smells, but it’s not fragrant. I recommend spraying something you love to smell and helps you feel in the mood.

Be sure that when you are spraying yourself with a body spray or using scented lotion, you stay away from areas that your spouse is going to lick.

Tell Yourself it Isn’t Gross

This can be a mind-over-matter type of thing. Start telling yourself that it isn’t gross to receive or give oral sex. Changing your thoughts from negative to positive can make a big difference. When you change the narrative in your mind, it makes it easier to believe. Just like you’d say a daily affirmation, you would tell yourself things like:

-This is going to feel good to me or my spouse.

-God gave us this sexual act for pleasure.

-I’m going to feel turned on doing this.

-It’s not gross, it’s pleasing.

-There’s no shame in doing this.

Get Really Aroused

When you get really aroused, you are much more willing to be adventurous in the bedroom. There are things you can do in advance to mentally arouse yourself such as:

-Playing sensual music.

-Lighting a candle that makes you think of sex.

-Visualize giving or receiving oral sex.

And, last but not least, spend time in foreplay getting yourself excited so that you can let your inhibitions down.

Try Different Oral Sex Positions

If it makes you feel weird to have your legs spread wide open while your spouse is giving you oral, consider a different position. A standing position can feel great and be less exposing. Or you could get on your knees and lean back on your hands so that your spouse can reach your genital area.

Don’t be Afraid to Speak Up

Unless you tell your spouse what they are doing that causes you to feel grossed out, then they will not know what to do differently. Don’t be afraid to share what you are feeling.

Here’s a few things you may deal with when it comes to feeling gross about this type of sex:

• Smells- if you need them to freshen up more, let them know. I know it can be a bit embarrassing to address that issue, but it’s better than never having oral.
• Sounds- sometimes slurping sounds happen during oral. You can point out that the noise makes you feel turned off. Whatever sounds are causing you to feel grossed out, find ways to reduce it.
• Hair- licking hair can feel pretty gross. Let your spouse know what areas you need them to groom so that you can feel more comfortable with this type of sex.
• Too wet- some people think that receiving oral is gross because it makes them really wet down there. If that is the case for you, ask your spouse not to lick around as much. They can still please you by staying focused on areas that feel great.
• The urge to fart– during sex of any kind, you can get the urge to have to fart. It can cause you to feel really self-conscious about receiving oral. If this is an issue for you, then tell your spouse you need a break for a minute and you’ll be right back. Go to the bathroom and take care of yourself.

Put Your Mouth on That Area More Often

Start small. You don’t have to commit to giving your spouse oral sex until they orgasm. Consider licking or kissing them as part of foreplay. And only move forward when you feel more comfortable.

The more you lick or kiss your spouse in that area, the more comfortable you will be with this. Consider wetting them down before you have sex as often as possible. You’ll start to get comfortable being down there for longer periods of time, and it will make giving them oral sex more pleasurable.

Hopefully, these tips will help you feel more comfortable giving your spouse oral sex. It can become something you truly love doing for them.