Take it from any married couple- getting on the same page with living together can be difficult. I brought on Mary Donnell to share with us a few tips she has learned about preparing to live with your spouse.
Here’s what she has to say-
It’s safe to say that I was ridiculously excited about living under the same roof as my spouse. After a brief period in which we continued to try to be these perfect models of ourselves, a few struggles started to creep up. Before you get married and move into together, here are some things to consider.
Assuming that ‘someone’ will do the housework
I thought we’d just live together in a happy bubble of bliss and the house would stay looking fab. Either that or that my spouse would sort things out. Being a somewhat pampered type who has a history of looking fabulous whilst surrounded by total chaos, I wasn’t too worried.
When you want to enjoy a romantic meal together and there is not a clean dish in the house, tempers can flare, and before you know it – you’re having your first full blown row.
It sounds awfully boring and responsible, but deciding who does which chores and creating a rota can save you a lot of frustrated arguing and allow you to make the most of your love nest.
Choosing everything for the house on your own
Choosing to think about what’s the best coffee grinder for you, or what furniture you’d like in the bedroom, is like deciding that your partner’s opinion doesn’t count. Living together is a partnership, so you need to work as a team.
Make a list of everything you’re going to need and divide it between you. For large, expensive purchases, talk it out and do your research until you find something that you are both happy with.
Thinking you have to be joined at the hip
No matter how much you love each other, spending every single second of every day together will chip away at your relationship. Psychologists say that couples who enjoy happy, fulfilled relationships make a point of spending time apart.
Taking a break from each other means that you will enjoy the time you do spend together much more. It also encourages you to develop more respect and appreciation for each other as individuals. Most importantly, what sort of love affair is it if you don’t get the chance to miss your other half sometimes?!
Living together is a great rehearsal for taking the plunge into marriage. If you already know not to speak to your partner before he has his morning coffee, or that he can’t stand mushrooms in your pasta sauce, or even that he likes to listen to cheesy pop music on a Thursday evening; you’re already on the right road to a successful marriage.