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Not Everyone is Doing It- Stop Believing the Lies that Porn is Healthy

Not everyone is doing it...why you should stop believing the lies about porn

When I was a teenager, I was made me feel like everyone was having sex with their significant others. That was simply not true at all. Plenty of us were abstinent. Now that I am a married adult, the internet wants me to believe that everyone looks at porn…again…not true.

Just Because You Read it on a Blog Doesn’t Make it Normal

I’m a marriage and sex blogger, so I read a lot of points of view in this area. If I based my judgement of what is normal and healthy about sex off of everything I read, then I would easily believe it is not only ok to watch porn, but it is healthy for your marriage.

No!

No!

No!

Serioulsy…no!

One of the things that I have found about blogs, is that it seems as though this writer ran an internet search about a topic and then just wrote the same exact thing on their blog that everyone else is saying on their blogs.

I’m stopping the cycle here people. I have read that porn is good and healthy for you as an individual and as a married couple, and I’m here to tell you that is the furthest thing from the truth.

It destroys!

It is addictive!

It cheapens intimacy and sex!

There is nothing at all good about this and I’m taking a stand against it. I am not the only one. There are a whole host of bloggers, marriage advisers, and organizations taking a stand.

I’m Fighting Against the New Drug

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Look, I didn’t label it the new drug, someone else did, but I’m here to fight against it. Porn is growing more and more rampant in our society than ever before.

It is no longer that secret sin that people try to hide. Oh no, people are engaging in it and encouraging everyone else around them to do the same.

How Does It Affect You Negatively?

Bad effects

If you have followed me for a while, then you know that I am a Christian and follower of Christ. I’m against porn because of my scriptural and biblical beliefs, as well as other reasons that I’m about to discuss. 

If you do not follow Christ or believe the Bible, then you could easily walk away from this article say, “she’s just a prude”….and you would be wrong!

The organization that has put together a campaign about fighting the new drug is not a Christian organization. Check out the website Fight the New Drug.

They do not bring religious belief systems into their campaign. They have done actual research and the studies have shown that this activity is damaging.

According to them, these are the top 3 ways it destroys everyone involved.

It Affects Your Brain

affects on your brain

Porn affects your brain…it is as addictive as any drug out there. This is why it is being labeled the new drug. Before the research that was done, we didn’t understand the affects of it the way we do now.

I’ve never talked with anyone that was recovering from this addiction that didn’t feel completely and 100% trapped in the activity. It controlled them just as any drug does.

When you are addicted to something, it escalates, meaning, you have to have a higher and higher rise every time to get that same feeling.

Why do you think there has been so much violence introduced into the films that are on the market right now? It is because of the outcry of the fans. They need bigger and better to keep reaching that high.

But I’m Not Addicted

First off….liar! You can say that you are not addicted if you want to, but I’ve known very few people that were addicted to something that recognized it or willing to admit it. Look, people I’m addicted to crackers and doughnuts…oh and pizza, we all have our thing.

Second off…even if you are not addicted (so you say), it is still affecting your brain, especially when it comes to your view of sex.

There are other ways watching it alters your mental state. It is linked to depression, loneliness, low self-esteem…the list goes on.

It Destroys Relationships

Destroys relationships

Even if you and your spouse have decided that this is a good activity to do together, it is still damaging your relationship and marriage.

When you climax, it releases a chemical in your brain that is known as the bonding chemical. When you use these images and videos to get aroused or to climax, you are training your brain to equate physical pleasure with those images. Instead of feeling aroused by your living, breathing partner that loves you, you struggle to feel aroused any other way.

Looking at pics and vids of others having sex, turns the act of sex into a merely physical thing that you do for self pleasure. REAL intimacy, REAL sex, REAL connection is not just about getting pleasure for yourself. As a married couple, you should use sex, communication, quality time, whatever, as a vehicle to be closer to one another.

Porn only causes you to be more dissatisfied in your sex life, instead of enhancing it like many bloggers will tell you.

What you see depicted in porn is nothing more than fantasy…and lies. It deceives you into thinking that it is real,but it isn’t.

Society is Affected

it affects society

So you might think, “my choice to look at others being intimate or undressed is my decision and it only affects me, or only affects my relationship”…wrongo!

Since it is growing in it’s normalcy in society, more and more people, kids included, are posting naked pictures of themselves on social media outlets. Have you ever scrolled through Instagram? It is heartbreaking to see the number of kids out there that are doing their first boob pics and shedding their clothes for follows and likes.

Not only are we seeing children, teens, and adults undressing before the camera, we are seeing more and more violence associated with physical intimacy. Do you really want the men of our society growing up believing that women are to be abused during sex? I know I don’t!

As the porn culture evolves and more and more acts are depicted, the generations that are watching will start to think that these things are normal.

I’ve never watched adult films, but I can tell you that a good part of it is theatrics. Most often, what feels good doesn’t film well. There are so many people out there that get shocked that physical union doesn’t look the way they thought…these depicted acts actually hurt the other person and isn’t acceptable.

Not all of porn is theatrics, mind you. There are plenty of people being forced into these films without their consent. I live in North Carolina, and you know what? Sex trafficking in my state is on the rise.

Aside from the theatrics side of things, actresses are being brutally hurt. Don’t believe me? Read the stories of these actresses that finally get out.

Let’s not even talk about revenge porn, which is also on the rise across the country. This is when a partner releases videos and pictures of their ex without their knowledge.

So please…someone…tell me how this is health for your love life. I am opening the floor up here, and I would love to hear what you guys have to say. Leave me a message in the comments explaining your point of view. Just as a disclaimer, I will not publish hate or vulgarity. However, if you want to share your point of view in a respectful way, please do.

I’m sure that I will have some of my Christian followers share with me that I should have focused this article more on the morality issues of not engaging in this activity. I understand where you are coming from. I will certainly address that end of things later on.

If you are married and are looking for ways to spice things up in a God honoring way, then check out this post I wrote.

Try These Ideas Out if You Are Craving More in The Bedroom

try these out if you want more in the bedroom

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