Tips For a Woman To Orgasm With a Vibrator

Orgasms are complicated for many women. Just because you can reach orgasm one way doesn’t mean you can reach it through a different method. Having only one way to orgasm can be discouraging for some women. Not being able to reach that point at all is even more discouraging. I did write an article on mentally preparing for an orgasm and some tips to help reach that point, if this helps some of you.

I’m going to assume that if you are reading this, then you aren’t against sex toys. If you are, then this isn’t an article for you.

I want to give you a few tips on using a vibrator to reach orgasm with your spouse. If you’ve never used a vibrator or had a hard time reaching orgasm with it, this article will give you tips on choosing the right new vibrator, positions to try, and overall tips to help you get there. It’s not uncommon to have to try different things or a sex toy to figure out what works for your body.

How to Orgasm With a Vibrator Index

Picking the Right Sex Toy

Choosing the right vibrator is the difficult part. You might be able to reach orgasm with one variety over another. This is where the trial and error (and, unfortunately, expense) comes in. If you pick one sex toy that doesn’t work for you, that doesn’t mean you should trash it. It may mean you need more practice or to try something different.

Here’s a quick look at the different types of vibrators-

Bullets

A bullet vibrator is egg-shaped and typically has a simple control. You can increase or decrease the vibrations, and that’s about it. The bullet vibrator is a great first toy because it is not complicated to use, and generally, they are cheap.

The bullet vibrators can be rubbed over the clitoris or even inserted into the vagina while receiving oral sex. Some women may like to have two so that one can be inserted while the other one is rubbed on their own body for more pleasure.

This is also a good solution if you are struggling to get the right stimulation for rear entry positions.

The downside to bullets is that they are really slippery. All sex toys should be covered in lubrication before use, to keep the irritation from occurring. Holding a slimy, vibrating ball can be a bit challenging.

Vibrating Penis Rings

The vibrating penis ring is meant to go on your husband and is positioned to stimulate you during sex. It is important to note that your husband may have a hard time getting the ring on his penis if he is fully erect. He should put it on with lubrication prior to becoming too stimulated.

This one can be a bit difficult to master because it may move around during sex. But it has its benefits, especially if your husband has entered you from behind. The vibrating penis ring can stimulate your clitoris while he makes love to you.

Dual Action

A dual-action vibrator has a wand that is inserted into the vagina. It also has a vibrating rabbit or some other type of clitoral stimulation on the outside. Usually, the vibrator on the outside has ears or something that sticks out that can reach your clit without putting too much direct stimulation on it.

Depending on the style, this sex toy may have a vibrator in the wand as well as the rabbit on the outside. The one with the vibrator on the outside usually offers greater clitoral stimulation and more vibration variety.

Massagers

The vibrating massager is similar to an egg or bullet vibrator. The good thing about this type is that it is easier to hold onto than an egg, depending on the type of stimulation you are trying to give.

These are just a few of the types of vibrators you can get. Check out the selection at Married Dance. I trust the toys there because I know the owner. He makes sure all toys are phthalate-free and in porn-free packaging.

How to Orgasm With a Vibrator

Once you have chosen the sex toy you want to try, then it is time to experiment. Here are a few things to keep in mind when using this type of stimulation.

Use Lubrication

To keep you from being irritated or overly stimulated, apply lubrication to the sex toy. Whatever lube you generally use should be fine. Coat the toy with the lube and place some on your vagina and clitoris as well. You may even need to reapply lubricant during your playtime.

If you are feeling a burning sensation or too much friction, add lube directly to your body and the part of the toy that is touching you. This will make it more comfortable for you. When you start drying out, it won’t be long before you get overstimulated.

Start Slow

There are different speeds on a vibrator. Depending on what you purchased, there may even be different patterns and motions. Whatever you do, start off with a slow vibration. You can always go up in intensity if it isn’t hard enough. Explore the new sensations and speeds of your new vibrator. You can start by rubbing your vibe on your upper thighs and work your way to your clitoris.

If you are already in the mood or feeling turned on, you will likely want to increase the speed because you’ll be ready for the vibration. On the other hand, if you’re using a sex toy to get warmed up, start on the lowest speed and work your way up.

Move The Toy Around

Another way to help your body build up to the stimulation is to move the toy around instead of keeping it in place. Teasing can be helpful when you are getting started. Although, I wouldn’t recommend teasing once you get really excited, because it might wreck your momentum.

Light touches work well at the beginning because it helps to build excitement. If you are getting overstimulated by the toy, back off the speed and reduce the pressure. You might even need to take it off of yourself completely.

It’s really hard for your husband to know how hard to push a toy on your clitoris. In this case, you can take control of the vibrator to get the proper pressure, or you can ask him to hold it still while you move your body across it.

Increase the Speed

As you warm up, the sensations should begin to build. Let your husband know when to increase the speed and how much. If the speed is too much for you, then pull the toy away from your clitoris a bit. That will keep the intensity down as you build up more.

Many vibrators have a separate remote so you can control your own speed. There are a lot of benefits to that because you can change the speed or vibration pattern quickly.

Add Foreplay

If you or your spouse is using a handheld toy, then you should consider adding in some foreplay. Ask him to do other things you enjoy, such as oral sex, besides just using the toy. These acts will increase the sensations and help you to reach orgasm.

Try Different Positions

You might want to start out lying on your back. That will let you be comfortable as you get warmed up. If it just isn’t doing enough, then get on your knees and let your husband reach you from behind. Standing up may be a good position for you as well. Each position you get into will give you a different sensation, so explore what works best.

You might want to-

• put a pillow under your butt if you are lying on the bed
• lean back while standing up
• pull the lips of your vagina open and up to expose more of your clitoris

Look at What’s Happening

One of the best things about using toys is it allows you to see what’s going on. This means you need the lights up and get into a position you can see. Rely on mirrors if you need to. If you don’t have a well-placed mirror, then use the camera on your phone to look into it. (I wouldn’t recommend recording if your phone automatically backs up to the cloud- I think no one wants Sex Tape to become a reality for them).

Experiment With The Toy on Yourself

I am not necessarily recommending you get off on your own and masturbate. That’s something you and your spouse have to decide is right or wrong for your marriage. However, what I’m suggesting is that you let your husband watch you pleasing yourself. I recognize that this is very vulnerable and something you’ll have to get comfortable with over time. But it’s really good for you to push yourself to let your spouse see you losing control and orgasm with a vibrator.

Using the sex toy on yourself and letting your husband watch you can give him ideas of what you need. Communication is also really important. If you need him to do something for you, then tell him.

Try More Than One Toy

If you don’t respond well to one sex toy, it might not be you. It could be that you have a toy that isn’t strong enough for your own body, or it is too strong. Consider getting another toy before you give up on being able to orgasm with a vibrator.

Know What to Expect

It is very possible that the first time you use a vibrator will be the best experience you have with the toy. Generally, when you try anything for the first time, you will have the greatest experience because they are new sensations. Don’t feel discouraged if the times thereafter are not as good. You can still enjoy using a vibrator.

Why Use a Vibrator?

There are a lot of scenarios in which vibrators can come in handy. Here are a few ideas and sex tips of when you might want to get it out-

• During periods– if you don’t like having sex on your period, then a vibrator can make for a great solution. You can use it on your clitoris without taking out your tampon or Dutchess Cup.
• On vacation– if you take a family vacation where you have to share a room with your kids, a vibrator can really come in handy. Many are waterproof (not all), so your spouse can use them while you are in the shower. Having sex standing up may not cause you to orgasm, so this will help you.
• When you are on pelvic rest- after you have a baby, there are several weeks where you aren’t supposed to be penetrated. A sex toy used just on your clitoris can help you reach orgasm without hurting yourself. If you are put on pelvic rest for the sake of a UTI, you may not want to use a toy. That’s a question for your doctor.
• If you’re struggling to reach orgasm– oftentimes, many women incorporate toys if they are struggling to orgasm at all. If your hormones have taken a dip, it can make it much more difficult to reach orgasm. The same is true if you are in an overly tired season. This can give you a short-term solution to bond with your spouse.

Should You Use A Sex Toy Regularly?

This is all a personal opinion here, but I think that you should figure out how to orgasm in many different ways. Once you figure out how to climax one way consistently, then you should add variety for more pleasure. Here’s why you should learn to reach the Big O in different ways-

• Won’t get bored- I know it sounds crazy that you would get bored from having this type of physical pleasure, but it happens. If you and your spouse have the same exact routine every time you make love, it is going to get boring. That is why being able to reach orgasm in different positions and with different methods is helpful.
• More flexible– if you rely on only one way to get there, then you are limiting yourself. It won’t always be appropriate to pull out a vibrator. Or you may not have space to get into the sex position you really enjoy. That’s why it is a good idea to expand your abilities.
• Become a master at sex– when you and your spouse have to figure out new positions and ways of reaching orgasm, you get better at sex. Mastering physical intimacy is a lifetime commitment. You never know what you’ll grow to love over time.

Hopefully, these sex tips will help you to orgasm with a vibrator. If you have any particular questions, be sure to send me a message at [email protected], and I will work to find an answer for you.

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