I hear people tell me they “really” want it all of the time. What’s it? That thing that they think they really want.
I really want to get a handle on my budget. I really want a cleaner house. I really want to be a better parent. I really want things to change in my marriage…
It’s an endless sea of “really” wants…but not ACTUALLY wants.
What I find is that when it is time for a person to put in the amount of effort that it takes to achieve what they really want- they pull back instead of moving forward.
A lot of times, what we “really” want is for the problem to be solved with minimal effort.
Here’s the truth- anything that is worth it, takes relentless effort and an obscene amount of time.
When you ACTUALLY want something, you will slog it out through the hard stuff. You will work hard day after day, week after week, year after year. You’ll fall down…get back up…only to fall down again…but you won’t care, because you ACTUALLY want it.
I know that internet is covered with titles like:
3 simple ways to____
Tricks to make _____ easier
Quick ways to _____
The secrets to _____
Headlines like that receive a lot of views, but lead you to believe that there is an easy button in life. All of those tips, tricks, and secrets still require work…work that has to be done by you.
If you want your house to be cleaned up…you have to clean it. If you want to have a home cooked dinner…you have to cook it. If you want to start a business…you have to do a million things. If you want you marriage to change…you have to change.
At the end of the day, you must be willing to put in the work needed to have the changes that you want. You might find that what you really want isn’t what you ACTUALLY want after all.
Guys, I’ll always give you the straight up truth here at Love Hope Adventure. I will not sugar coat things or make things seem easy when they aren’t.
When it comes to relationships, it is complicated.
There isn’t a cut and dry formula you can follow to fix your problems. It is going to require more time, energy, patience and effort than what you think you can stand.
There are going to be days when you want to give up and walk away from your marriage. Then there will be days when you realize how much you care for your spouse and things will be great between you.
My question to you is this, do you ACTUALLY want it? Or do you “really” want it?