One of my biggest tips for married couples is to schedule sex. A lot of people buck against me on that one, because they think it takes all the romance and excitement out of it. I think television has made us feel that way. If we don’t rip each other’s clothes off during a kissing frenzy, then it’s not amazing sex. I completely disagree. Scheduled sex can be super hot and here’s how.
1. Remind Each Other Early in The Day
Like anything else you put on your calendar, it’s important to remind each other about it. If your kid needs to get picked up at a different time, you’re going to send a reminder text right? Supposed to meet someone for dinner? You’re going to mention it before you part ways in the morning. You need to do the same thing on the days you are planning to have sex.
There are plenty of ways you can send sexy reminders to your spouse. You might send them a quick text that says, “can’t wait till later”. Or maybe you leave them a handwritten note in a place they’ll see it.
One of my favorite ways is to shoot a message through an app like Couple. If you establish this app as a place where you only write sexy things to your spouse, then they will know you are sending something steamy when they get the notification. Also, it’s password protected so no worries of the kids or folks at work seeing it.
2. Flirt Throughout the Day
I think a lot of couples abandon flirting after their dating years. What is flirting? I think of it as a loving ways to get your spouse’s attention. Maybe you give them a sexy look from across the room or say compliment the way they look. It could be a cheesy one liner or sweet hug and kiss.
One word of caution about flirting is that you need to learn what types of flirting your spouse responds to best. One of the biggest ways I see husbands flirt with their wives is to grab a boob. Not all women see copping a feel as flirting. Ask them what they like and aim to do those things.
Even if you are not home together, you can send a flirty text. You can call them on the phone for a few minutes and say something sweet to them.
3. Start Foreplay Before You Head to Bed For Sex
Get each other warmed up before you get to the bedroom. This might be the time when grabbing a boob or pinching a butt is welcomed. It’s a lot of fun to rub on your spouse here and there leading up to bed.
Jay Dee over at Uncovering Intimacy talked about how he and his wife spent a day having sex. They ran off for a few minutes to indulge in a little foreplay. They would stop before he climaxed but would keep going if she could. Women can have multiple orgasms without the refractory period, so it makes this approach fun for them.
The best way to make sex hot is to go into the night already excited. If it’s simply on the schedule, but neither of you says anything about it or act on it, then it will likely fall flat. Use the schedule to your advantage and build anticipation with each other.
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