I’m happy to introduce you to Daren, the founder of Active Manhood, where he aims to help men be the leaders God wants them to be. He is coming on today to share about spiritual leadership in the home and Biblical masculinity. Daren has a lot of great scriptures to share with us.
Check out what he has to say-
1 Corinthians 16:13 “Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong.”
Whatever happened to the obvious biblical roles within the family structure? How have the “new” ideas of marriage identity, toxic feminism, and the rise of gender politics affected us?
I bet you will agree with me when I tell you that fatherlessness has become a plague in America because it’s obvious and it’s true.
The divorce rate isn’t much better. Guys have been abandoning their role as men for decades now, and the tragic results are becoming all too real.
1. Men are Feeling De-valued
The biblical mandate for men to be the spiritual leaders in their homes, and to fulfill their God-given responsibilities, once provided purpose and value for Christian men.
With the constant barrage of modern media undermining the value of husbands and fathers in our culture, it’s no wonder that men have become self-absorbed, immature, and irresponsible. How else should they respond?
Throughout the scriptures, God emphasized the vitally important and dominant role of men in human civilization. The man was made first but was not complete without woman. Marriage then became the very first God-ordained institution.
Men were designed by God to be protectors, providers, planners, and preparers. The Heavenly Father made us to walk with Him, and lead our families to humble submission to Him, and His will for us.
Today, those thoughts are considered outdated and irrelevant for modern society. Phrases like “toxic masculinity” are tossed around the media like a hot potato, and men are having their God-given role in the family and society, marginalized and minimized.
When a man’s biblical role is de-valued by our culture, then our sense of purpose, direction, and responsibility are diminished with it.
We read scriptures such as:
1 Timothy 5:8 “But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.”
Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;” What do those scriptures mean to a man, that has been told that he is no longer needed or relevant in that capacity?
How are guys to take on the incredible blessing of leading a wife and children, with biblical virtue, loyalty, and God-given purpose, when the very act of doing so is called bigoted, old-fashioned, and out of touch by our culture?
Ladies, I cannot tell you enough how important it is for you to uplift and encourage your husband every day. He finds his value in doing what God made him for.
Your husband will thrive with your admiration and will become weak when you are silent. He needs to know that he is valued and that you admire his efforts to fulfill his biblical role, in a culture that now disregards God’s design for the family.
2. Men are Failing to Find Value
There was a time in America when most guys, Christian or not, understood their role in life and found great value in fulfilling that role in the family. Even when the struggles of life were seemingly insurmountable, the sense of personal responsibility to those who rely on us as men would carry the day.
Christian guys find their value in God, and in the purpose that he designed us for. When we are no longer able to find value in that, where do we turn?
Far too often guys become workaholics or alcoholics. Without a clear purpose to apply themselves to, they turn to pleasing self, rather than pleasing God.
The family has always been the place where men find their value. When that is true, they find the strength and support they need to contribute in greater ways to their family, church, community, and country. Strong families produce strong men, women, and children.
However, biblical manhood and biblical womanhood are being subverted by Satan, to undermine the family, to defy God, and to breed rebellion.
The results are painfully obvious as we look at the culture in which we live. Morality has become profane, marriage has been redefined, and the children who escape the abortion mills, are now the property of the state.
Isaiah 5:20 “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!”
3. Men are Forgetting Biblical Values
There are certain values and virtues, found in the scriptures, that not only give us a moral foundation but guide and direct us towards true success in life. But who is passing those on to the next generation?
Deuteronomy 6:4–9 “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: 5. And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. 6. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7. And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
8. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. 9. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.”
Where is a man supposed to learn these biblical values? Who is teaching them to love God with their hearts, soul, mind, and strength? If they didn’t learn it when they were growing up in their own family, and from the Word of God, then where?
Your answer might be “the church”. Well, consider that:
- The typical Christian church in America is only 39% male.
- More than 70% of boys raised in the church, will abandon it.
- Only 1 out of every 6 Christian men, actually attend church.
Here Are My Final Thoughts
Marriage is a God-ordained institution, created by Him as an example of His love. The depth of God’s purpose for giving us such a splendid relationship is beyond our ability to fathom.
However, we do know that as a biblical leader, we are to be a symbolic example of Christ loving the church.
Ephesians 5:21–33 “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. 22. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. 24. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
25. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26. That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27. That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
28. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30. For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
32. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”
Let us not neglect our God-given roles, but fulfill them with love, humility, and submission to Christ.
Bio – Daren Dilts has been happily married for 30 years, and has raised 5 children who love the Lord. He is a pastor, and the founder and voice behind Active Manhood, an online community for Christian men.