It is bound to happen at some point or another, an argument is going to come up between you and your spouse while you’re out in public or in front of others. This is especially going to be true if you’re going through a difficult time in your relationship.
I’m not saying you can’t disagree with your spouse in front of others. What I am saying, is that if it starts getting heated and you can see that it’s going to lead to an argument, then you need to do what you can to diffuse the situation. There’s nothing worse for your relationship than to humiliate or embarrass your spouse in front of others.
So, what do you do when you start to argue when other people are around? There are some things you can do to defuse the bomb and keep from losing it.
Decide Ahead of Time How to Handle It
Most of the time, it doesn’t occur to you to have a discussion about how to handle arguments ahead of time. This is one of those things you should talk about with your partner in order to come up with some ground rules. No one wants to be embarrassed by their spouse.
If you didn’t have this conversation before the first public fight happens, you will definitely want to have it after to avoid future problems.
Come Up With A Code Word Or Look
A lot of times, fights happen when you least expect it. One of you might say something that bothers the other person without trying. When you are at home or in private, you can tell your partner that what they are saying is bothering you. Out in public, you don’t have the ability to come right out and say that they have hurt your feelings.
Come up with a code word or look that you can use when you are feeling attacked by your significant other. This will tip them off that they are crossing lines with you and a fight is going to break out.
Agree to Leave The Room or Event if Possible
Sometimes, you have to address something right away and it can’t wait until later. If that is the case, ask the person if they will leave the room with you. This will get you away from an audience and the stress of people.
Find a private place and say what you need to say at that moment, but then agree to pick the conversation back up later on. You can’t have the entire conversation right then and there, but you can talk about behavior or other problems.
Pick Up The Conversation Later
Leaving the room is not always possible. As hard as it might be, you will need to stop the conversation and pick it up later when you are at home. This will mean that you can’t push the issues or say things that entice your partner while you are in public.
Re-Direct Your Focus
Sometimes, you need to resort to distracting yourself or your partner. Most of the time, if you have a few minutes to cool off some, then you can drop the argument later.
You might need to excuse yourself for a few minutes and take a walk. If you can’t immediately leave the room, then change the subject.
I hope these ideas will help you to get ahead of fighting in front of other people and saying things that you regret later.
For other blogs about communication, check out this blog.