Looking for ways to strengthen your marriage? Check out this guest post.
Making sure your relationship goes from strength to strength is key to living a happy life with your spouse. There are an abundance of ways you can do this, and below, we have outlined a few things to look out for that will give you inspiration.
Read on for some great advice and things to work on to ensure you and your partner enjoy long, happy lives together:
1. Find Things In Common
Having things in common with your partner can be a great bonding opportunity. Of course, relationships can work where you don’t have anything in common at all. But it’s important to try to find some shared hobbies or interests. This can really give your relationship a new, exciting dimension. Being interested in your partner’s life and differences is also key, and they should take an interest in yours, too.
2. Get Comfortable Around One Another
There should be a sense of ease around you and your partner. You should both feel a sense of security and comfort that you just don’t feel with anybody else. If you feel insecure around them, like you can’t tell them how you really feel or share your hopes and dreams with them, figure out why that is. Do you fear being vulnerable and open with your spouse?
The best relationships are those where you feel comfortable enough to be yourself. You don’t necessarily need to talk about and share everything, but you should be able to talk through difficult subjects with them.
3. Respect One Another
There’s liking and loving one another, and then there’s respecting one another.
-Have mutual respect for one another
– Respect each other’s opinions
-Avoiding things like name-calling (even in the heat of the moment)
-Do not make them feel small for whatever reason
You and your spouse should respect one another even in arguments. If you can’t hold your tongue, walk away until you have your emotions under control.
4. Plan A Future That Pleases You Both
You need to make sure your values and plans for the future align to go from strength to strength as a married couple. Do they want to visit Parc Clematis and even retire there, but you want to buy a small bungalow in your hometown?
Things can change over time, especially if you’re both young, which is why making sure you’re on the same page is vital. You should have similar stances on marriage, kids, lifestyle, pets, and where you want to live in the future. What’s important to the both of you?
5. Argue Like Grown-Ups
Arguments and disagreements happen, especially in marriages. Just because somebody is ‘the one’ for you doesn’t mean you will never have an argument in your life. You just both need to make sure you can argue like grown ups.
How do you do that? Well, neither one of you tries to ‘win’ the argument.
Here’s what trying to win looks like….you:
-Don’t try to get ‘one up’ on the other.
-Try to figure out why you’re both upset, understand the other person’s perspective, and listen.
-Come to a compromise. You avoid language that points blame, too, and instead put a focus on how each of you feels.
It takes practice, but these communication skills are invaluable.
6. Respect One Another’s Independence
Having your own friends, hobbies, space, and time is crucial in a relationship, even a long term one. If you both feel the need to spend every waking hour with one another, it could point to a co-dependent relationship where neither of you knows who you are without the other.
It sounds romantic, but it could be extremely unhealthy and leave you both feeling lost and unhappy. Co-dependent relationships aren’t always happy relationships, either. Trying to cultivate your own hobbies and space could be a great thing to do for the both of you. You’ll both have far more to talk about at the dinner table, too!
7. Pick Your Battles Carefully
While communication and arguing like grown-ups is key, and you should definitely let your spouse know if you are unhappy with something, there’s great power in picking your battles.
You don’t need to bring up every tiny thing they do that annoys you. Make sure that when you bring something up for discussion, it’s important. Make sure you use the right language and avoid pointing blame as we mentioned earlier, too!