Have you ever thought about taking a kissing challenge with your husband or wife? Some challenges might recommend you kiss for at least one minute for a week or maybe you should challenge yourself to kiss every day at least once.
I am a huge proponent of intimacy in marriage and I believe that kissing is a big part of that. When you are in your dating years, you likely spent a lot of time making out with your boyfriend or girlfriend; that is of course unless you were part of those that kissed dating goodbye. (FYI, we dated for 5 and 1/2 years before we got married, so after about 2 years of kissing we stopped completely. Yikes I know!)
Regardless of whether you spent your days of dating or the early years of marriage locking lips with your boyfriend or girlfriend, what about now?
Why is it Important to Kiss Your Spouse
There are so many reasons why kissing your spouse is important for your marriage. Here are just a few of those reasons:
Affection- a simple peck can show someone how much you care for them. Showing your spouse affection on a daily basis is crucial to a healthy marriage. It is easier to be affectionate when you are used to doing it often.
Acceptance- when you put your lips on your loved ones, you are communicating acceptance of them.
Intimacy- being face to face with your spouse brings immediate intimacy. Intimate encounters are not the only way to bring closeness in a marriage.
What Keeps Couples From Kissing?
If you have gotten to a place in your marriage where this act of love is no longer happening, then I am urging you to figure out why you no longer kiss. Maybe you have a time issue and feel like you must choose between having an intimate encounter or making out, so you choose the passionate time together without kissing.
Or perhaps there are other reasons that keep you from tasting your loved one’s mouth. For a long time, I avoided prolonged smooching if I didn’t have the desire to take things further. You know what I’m talking about. I think women are more inclined to this way of thinking than men. In fact, my lack of desire kept me from many forms of flirting with my husband. After several years, I addressed this problem within myself and decided that I would flirt and kiss freely, even if I didn’t have the desire at that moment to be intimate later.
You will have to figure out for yourself what keeps you from making out with your spouse. I encourage you to address any issues you have with this act because it is affecting your sex life.
Married Kissing Challenge Ideas
Here is a list of kissing challenges you can try with your husband or wife. Pick the one that you both think you’ll like the most! Oh…and btw, kissing doesn’t have to always mean locking lips. Some of these challenges are aimed at kissing other parts of your body. 😀
You can challenge yourself to do one of these ideas every day for a week or just once. Or pick something different from the list every day for a week. The more concerted effort you make with kissing, the more you will:
- Makeout on the couch before bed
- Kiss for two minutes while you’re naked
- Ask your spouse where they want to kiss you every day
- During sex, stop and makeout for a minute
- Start kissing right before one or both of you reach orgasm
- Kiss each other hello or goodbye
- Kiss while wearing your favorite flavored chapstick
- Kiss three times a day on a schedule you choose
- Find a new place to kiss their body every day
- Cut off the lights and engage in a steamy makeout session
- Put a piece of candy in your mouth and let the sweetness fill your mouth while you kiss
- Put on a slow song and dance while you kiss
- Sneak behind closed doors and steal a kiss
- Recreate your first kiss
- Push your spouse against the wall and kiss them
- Makeout in the car
Other Ways to Make Kissing a Priority
I hate to say it this way, but sometimes, you just have to get in the habit of being passionate with your significant other. It almost sounds as if it is some sort of duty to your spouse, which can seem like a complete turn-off. However, I think that making intimacy and making out a priority by doing it habitually, will lead to a more natural passion.
Here are a few ideas that will help you make kissing a priority.
Play Kiss Me I’m Irish
Kiss Me I’m Irish is a bedroom game I created for St. Patrick’s Day. Each of the prompts tells you to kiss your spouse one way or another. I get really creative with the prompts and it moves from your mouth to your other sultry areas.
Plan a Makeout Session
I know that initially this doesn’t sound very romantic, but that is not to say it won’t lead to something exciting. Making a plan and putting it on the calendar is a great way to build anticipation. Not only that, you will have cleared your schedule and you know you have time to do this. Go ahead and make up your mind that this session is going to lead to an intimate encounter. That is the best way to feel free to make out.
You can check out my full article about why kissing goodbye is beneficial in marriage. This was modeled for me by my parents and my brothers. I saw a lot of great things come from this in their relationships. So, we model this for our kids now.
Say Thank You By Locking Lips
Instead of just using the words thank you to convey that message, consider planting one on your loved one.
There is no doubt that intimacy in marriage is built by many different actions, and making out is one of the top things that lead to closeness.