This article comes from Chapter 6 of our Creative Conversation Starters book, available in ebook or paperback. When you purchase the paperback edition, you’ll also get the Kindle edition free!
Young couples often get saddled with way too much for their wedding. We’ve made weddings into massive events with lots of pressure and expectations. A couple (or more often the bride) has to make a thousand little decisions – color schemes, themes, locations, invitation, invitation lists, seating arrangements, menu, flowers, honeymoon plans. GAH! Wedding overload!
If you’re reading this, you’re likely already married, so we’ll skip the “don’t stress so much about your wedding” speech. However, we do still have something to say to married couples.
YOUR WEDDING DAY IS NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY OF YOUR MARRIAGE
Your wedding day is just the first day of your marriage. It’s the next four, five, or six decades that really matter. In fact, you could say the last day of your marriage is the most important.
What will be the last day of your marriage? It could be divorce. It could be the day the love finally dies, even if there is no formal divorce. Or, it could be the day one of you dies.
TILL DEATH DO US PART… SERIOUSLY
It may sound macabre, but you or your spouse dying is a great day in your marriage. It means you reached the finish line. Not in a I’m-so-glad-that’s-over kinda way. Rather, in the sense that you stayed true to your vows. You were in it for the long haul, and you made it.
So with all the work and planning we put into our wedding, are we doing the same in our marriages? Are you thinking about where your relationship with your spouse will be in forty years? That’s the kind of thinking that makes marriages last – the long view.
We’re going to be talking in the coming weeks about building an enduring legacy. This is the really long view. This approach views marriage through the lens of your grandkids marriages. What you do today will not only affect your marriage but that of your children and their children.
YOUR WEDDING DAY WAS STILL A BIG DAY THOUGH
Don’t get me wrong, the first day of your marriage is still a big deal. It was likely an amazing and memorable day. Take some time for you and your spouse to recall some of what made that day special. Hopefully, some details will pop up that one or both of you had forgotten about. Break out the old photos, fire up your noggin and get to reminiscing.
But always remember to keep the last day of your marriage in mind as you continuing building your marriage relationship.