I just want you to know that this title is absolutely obnoxious. But, if you read the article that’s circulating around the web about men preferring debt free virgins (without tattoos), then you know what I’m talking about.
Btw, I’m not going to link to the original article because that author does not deserve a link on my website. It will only increase her visibility online and I don’t want to support that.
Also, on another side note, this post is out of character for me. I don’t make it a practice to call out other Christian bloggers for their beliefs. However, the author that put out the post about men preferring debt free virgins without tattoos spoke about women in such a derogatory way, I just can’t be quiet about it. Not only that, she painted Christian men in a way that I can’t get behind.
The Article Wasn’t About Debt, Sex, or Tattoos
What’s really got me is that this article wasn’t about debt, sex or tattoos. It was really about why women shouldn’t go to college. What I walked away learning in this article is that by going to college, Christian women will lose their morals and values. So, it’s better that they avoid college altogether because then their husbands will have years of unteaching to do (this is actually stated in the article).
I’ve Read the Bible But I Don’t Agree With Transformed Wife
People, we are all going to interpret the Bible differently. I’m positive that the Transformed Wife believe everything she posted on her website. It’s her website and she’s entitled to share what she believes.
It’s not about what she believes, it is how she shared it with the reader. I walked away feeling completely judged, even though I was a debt free, virgin, without tattoos, that lived at home with my parents until I got married! I cannot imagine what others are feeling that don’t fit into that mold.
I don’t have the answer as to why Christians come to different conclusions about the Bible, even though we read the same verses. But, we do and we should all (including myself) get better at not judging others on their beliefs.
Do What God Leads You To Do
Single sisters, our calling as Christians is to be more like Christ. You have a personal relationship with God. As a believer, you have the same Holy Spirit inside of you that a Christian male has. Whether you are a single woman or a married woman, you are called to be more like Christ.
I Went to College Because I Followed God
If you consider community college legit, I went for three years and got two Associate degrees. Believe it or not, I managed to get out of there without debt, without losing my virginity, and without tattoos (gasp!). Although, I was loud and independent long before I went to college…just saying.
According to the Transformed Wife, I shouldn’t have gone to college, but since I did, one can only hope Austin set me straight after being brainwashed. You know I’ve always been the submissive type (yeah right! In all seriousness, I’m working on it.)
I Lived With My Parents Until I Got Married, But That Doesn’t Mean You Should
Look, I stayed home with my parents until the day I got married. But not because I believed Austin would find me anymore sexy. I was a cheapskate. It was much cheaper to stay home and live with my parents until Austin and I got married. Besides, I love my parents and I treasured the years I had with them at home before I got married. Oh…and I’m an extrovert so empty houses make me crazy.
I don’t see anywhere in the scripture that says women shouldn’t live on their own. I think each woman should do what the Lord leads her to do in this situation. God may call you to singleness. Does that mean you should forever live in your parents home? Not if God tells you to do something else.
I Was a Debt Free, Virgin, Without Tattoos on My Wedding Day- Big Deal
Let me tell you something. Austin Reason was not attracted to the fact that I was debt free, a virgin, and without tattoos. Basically, my boobs were enough. 😀
But in all seriousness ladies, this is not the qualities that all men look for in a wife. Are there men out there that want that? I’m sure there are. Just the same as there are men out there that want a woman that is covered in tats, has a college degree, a job, a house, or any number of things.
I Work and I Train My Kids in The Way They Should Go
I don’t think it has to be an either or when it comes to raising kids in the way they should go and work. But, there are many people out there that feel that way. I get it. I really do.
For many years, God called me to stay home with the kids 100% and homeschool them. About 5 years ago, He made it possible for me to work from home while I homeschooled them. This past year, I sent them to public school so I could spend more time working from home and outside the home. At every point, I’ve followed what God led me to do.
The Proverbs 31 Woman Worked and Trained Her Kids
I believe the Proverbs 31 wife worked. She was a busy woman. Here are just a few things she did:
- Bought wool and flax and worked with willing hands
- Provided food to her household and maidens
- Looked and fields and bought them
- Planted the fields with her own hands
- Knew exactly what her products were worth
- Spun yarn on a spindle to make material
- Made clothes and bed coverings for her family and ones to sell
This sounds like a world-class business woman to me. She was so productive that she met all of her family’s needs and then had enough excess to sell. What a woman!
It also says that her children rise up and call her blessed. She is a woman that’s involved in her kids’ lives even though she works.
There should be no judgment towards women that want to work outside the home and put their children in childcare. I’m going to tell you what, the Proverbs 31 wife had help. She had maidens for a reason. She wasn’t the only one ever taking care of her kids.
The same goes for the woman that wants to stay home with her kids. Plenty of women stay home with their children because they want to. Or they stay home because they simply can’t afford childcare. There’s more than one way to have a God-honoring family.
I’m Sorry For All the Crap That Goes Viral
So, on behalf of poorly written blogs everywhere, including the one put out by the Transformed Wife, I’m sorry. I’m sorry bloggers have the ability to cast judgment on others without a single care. I’m sorry that garbage like that goes viral while the rest of us encouraging folks can’t be found. In fact, I’m not the only debt free, virgin, without tattoos to speak up against this. Check out what Phylicia has to say in God’s Not Looking for Debt-Free Virgins.
Above All- Pursue God
To all my girls out there with debt, college degrees, past or present sexual partner(s), and tattooed bodies, you are loved. God’s got a man for you that will find you incredible the way you are. Stay in the word and follow Him.