I listened to my friend Belah Rose talk about this today on the Delight Your Marriage podcast. This is the episode where she talks about the 3 things men want in sex and one of those things is that your husband wants you to pay attention to his penis. If you aren’t familiar with Belah, she’s interviewed me before over there about how women can orgasm.
Your Husband Wants You To Pay Attention to His Penis
In that specific podcast episode about what men want, she talked about something that I think many wives have never thought of doing for their husband…and that is to pay attention to your husband’s penis. Many men crave their wife’s attention to this area. They want their wife to talk about it, enjoy it themselves, and give it all types of attention.
Maybe that seems weird to a woman, because she may have the complete opposite feeling about her husband paying attention to her vagina. I’ve had plenty of women write in and tell me that they are self-conscious about the way their vagina looks, especially after they’ve had a baby. Or maybe they feel uncomfortable receiving a lot of attention to their vagina for other reasons…possibly on account of sexual abuse, the way they smell down there if they’ve been on their period recently, or any number of reasons.
Your Husband Can Feel Loved By This Action
However, many men want their wives to pay attention to their penis in a loving and caring way. Men feel loved and cared for through sexual affection, so spending time on their penis can communicate love to them. Not only that, most men are desperate for their wives to enjoy sex with them. I don’t say desperate in a bad way here, I just mean it’s a deep passion for them to want to be desired.
Just like a woman wants her husband to tell her she’s beautiful on a regular basis, a husband wants a woman to tell him his penis is a source of pleasure for her and that she is attracted to it.
They Don’t Feel Comfortable Saying This
I think a lot of men don’t feel comfortable asking their wives to do this. They want to use this part of their body to please their wife and be pleased by their wife. But, if they start asking their wife to pay detailed attention to this area, they might feel like they are being a pervert or using their wife. Or worse, they may think their wife will feel like they are a pervert or using them in some way.
Pay Attention to His Penis Without Him Asking
As a woman, you want your husband to pay attention to you. You crave his attention in many ways. You want him to tell you he thinks your hair looks great. You want him to pursue you sexually with his words and actions. You want him to notice the things you do for the family.
Not only is it not weird for your husband to pay attention to you, you expect it. He has the same desires. His desires include you giving extra attention to his member. A way to bless your husband is to find ways to pay attention to this part of him without him asking. We always feel more loved when our spouse does things for us that we truly need without mentioning it to them.
Turn Admiration Into Intimacy
It’s ok to let your attention to his penis turn into a time of intimacy. Not that this is the only reason you should look at him or talk about his penis. However, it is great foreplay for him and can be a real turn-on for you.
The more you do this, the easier it will be for you. Anytime you are apprehensive about something in the bedroom, exposing yourself a little at a time is how to work through it.
What You Can Do To Give Your Husband’s Penis More Attention
So now that you are officially freaked out about what your husband may expect from you, I want to give you a few ways you can pay attention to your husband’s penis to take the pressure off of you.
- Hold his penis while you make out.
- Rub up against him through his pants when you are hugging.
- Grind your butt into his penis either while you cuddle in bed or during the day as a tease.
- While you are having sex, tell your husband what you think about his penis. You can tell him how it makes you feel or what it looks like.
- Give him a blow job, if even only for a few minutes to warm him before sex.
Hopefully, you can give your husband sexual confidence and feelings of love by admiring his member.